Mission 2.7
Сonditional sentences

They come in handy when you need to say what will or would happen if...

· "As soon as I've had my legs ripped off, I'll resign at once!"
· "If I hadn't been shell-shocked, I'd be singing in a choir now!"
1. Conditional sentences are always comprised of two parts.

· I'll murder him ✕ if he doesn't call tomorrow.
· When I die ✕ I will leave all my money to charity.

2. One of them expresses the condition:

...if he doesn't call tomorrow...
...When I die

The other says what will or would happen if the condition is met:

...I'll murder him.
...I will leave all my money to charity.

The two parts can change places if you need them to.
Conditionals can be conveniently divided into 3 types.

You are already familiar with the first type from a recent mission. That one is about the future.

(Зум по клику)
• If you BEHAVE yourself, I WILL take you to the zoo.

• If you don't BEHAVE yourself, I WILL not take you to the zoo.

• When I SEE Sam, I WILL beat the shit out of him.

Exactly: it's the conditional type in which you don't need to put WILL in the if/when part.
Even though it's about the future.
If+Present ✕ Future
* If you do say "When I will see Sam", that will mean something like "when I am willing to see..."
Do you need that shade of meaning? Not that often.
The second type refers to the present,
• If I WERE* a billionaire, I WOULD buy a castle.

• Even if I KNEW her name, I WOULD not tell you.
If+Past ✕ Would
All of these sentences are about an alternative present. "If wishes were horses..." and so on.

It's not necessarily purely wishful thinking. A mere "if":
* You aren't seeing things. In conditionals, WERE can be used even with a singular subject.
• If you BEHAVED yourself, I WOULD TAKE you to the zoo now.
• If he WASN'T/WEREN'T Russian, he WOULD need to learn Cyrillic.
Sometimes, it is just a polite request:
• I WOULD be very grateful if you COULD just shut up.
which could possibly be different, but it's not:
The third type is about the past.
• If you HAD BOUGHT that goddam lottery ticket, we WOULD HAVE WON a fortune.

• If Lady Diana HAD BEEN WEARING a seatbelt, she WOULD HAVE survived.
If+Past Perfect ✕ Would have V3
It's not necessarily a regret.

Sometimes it's the opposite: "phew, a close one!" or "it's a good job that...":
• If you HADN'T ACCEPTED the job, we WOULD not HAVE MOVED to Auckland.
• I WOULD not HAVE PASSED the exam if I HAD PICKED a different question.
About something that already happened and cannot be changed.
1) You don't need to use WILL/WOULD in the conditional clause (with WHEN or IF in it).

You will be itching to put in this WILL - but try to hold yourself back:
2) The second and the third types sound the same in Russian.

3) The types are derived from one another. (1➔ 2 ➔ 3)

Just put the verb "further into the past":

- If you behave (1) yourself, I will take you to the zoo.
- If you behaved (2) yourself, I would take you to the zoo now.
- If you had behaved (3) yourself yesterday, I would have taken you to the zoo.

When I go ✔
When I will go
If I went ✔
If I would go
The best news is that you can combine bits of different types:
If the Yanks had not helped your asses,
condition in the past, type 3
consequence in the present, type 2
you Brits would be speaking German!
It's called Mixed Conditionals, and you will surely learn to come up with such sentences automatically.
1. Come up with your own logic in constructing the 3 types of conditional sentences and their interconnection.

2. Draw up a simple table of 9 cells, which will explain all three types even to a neanderthal.

3. Highlight its regularities which will help you remember them (staircase is the key word).